I like to play “name that ‘80s band and why they are important to modern culture” with my children. I’m sure this prepares them for life and success.
One morning “Sweet Child O’ Mine” came on the radio and I immediately yelled at Hannah to name the band and their important social impact. No dice. She had no clue.
Guns N’ Roses, in case you were under a rock in the ‘80s.
And then I had to tell her the story about how Axl Rose made her grandpa famous. This might be my favorite story about growing up as the mayor’s daughter. My sweet father, who clicks his tongue every time I swear, was mayor when Guns N’ Roses decided to include Grove City, Ohio in their tour. My father did not approve of their music or language so he fussed at them some.
They came to Grove City and the Stage family sat on their front porch listening to the music fill the suburban skies. And then Axl Rose, the Axl Rose, announced for all to hear, “Mayor Stage, you can (expletive)!” (I’ll edit that because I can hear my father clicking his tongue 3,000 miles away).
I immediately pointed out the obvious to my father. He was now famous. Axl Rose doesn’t make that offer to everybody. Actually he might, but not in front of thousands.
I realized this morning on our drive to school as I told Hannah the story and then sang the rest of the song, I don’t tell my folks nearly enough how thankful I am for them.
Parenting is hard and they did an amazing job of trying to protect us from negative influences and experiences. But there’s only so much protecting parents can do. The great gift they gave me was equipping me with integrity and a sense of knowing I was loved in success and failure.
I hope we can do the same for our kids. I know I can’t protect them from hearing and seeing lots of negative stuff, especially since I’m normally watching the movie with them.
But we are good at loving each other. We laugh tons. It took me 10 minutes to blow out my birthday candles because they got me giggling so hard. And we confess when we mess up.
We joke about the therapy jar. I know I’m not always the best mom ever. I’m trying to take as many pictures of my children as I do of my chicken.
In reality, like most parents, we do the best we can with what we have.
I’m thankful for my parents. May I have the wisdom and patience to parent with grace and courage.
And if Axl Rose ever comes to Juneau … I have no idea how to complete that thought. Kind of like parenting.
• Tari Stage-Harvey is the pastor at Shepherd of the Valley Lutheran Church.
