The Empire Editorial Board’s Christmas List

Published 2:47 am Saturday, December 23, 2017

Dear Santa,

We have been good this year (well, most of us) and think we are deserving of everything below. You’re a busy man — especially tonight! — so we’ll get straight to our list.

This year — pretty please — we would like:

• Oil prices to rise to $700 per barrel

• Peace on earth and on Facebook comments

• A wintry winter

• A clear, spring-like spring

• A sunny, summery summer

• A fall-like … um, never mind

• For king salmon stocks in Southeast to rebound to their former levels

• For our PFDs to triple (with the rising oil prices, two birds with one stone!)

• Alaska Airlines upgrades to first class (did you know they serve warm chocolate chip cookies?)

• Stranger Things Season 3 to be released Christmas morning

• A balanced state budget

• No more taxes

• A hula hoop

• A smashed patriarchy

• For people to stop calling major news networks with rigorous vetting for stories and corrections for any errors that occur “fake news”

• An informed, engaged citizenry who reads (and buys) newspapers (thanks, readers!)

• A lack of conflict between any of the above desires

In anticipation of Christmas morning, we are sending a year’s subscription to the elves, reindeer and Mrs. Claus so they can read all about the good things in store for Juneau in 2018. Here’s hoping it’s a great year for all of us.

Merry Christmas and happy holidays to all!