My favorite restaurant in Tucson served the best chips and salsa I have ever had. Granted, I was in college when I first had them, so that declaration has to be qualified. We’d clean out a few bowls each visit, but always still ordered off the menu.
Last week a student listed his four post-graduation options, but they were the exact same as they had been in March and were listed with a touch less enthusiasm. This concerned me. All four options seemed to suit him well, but I was concerned he’d never make a choice. He would graduate and never order off life’s menu, sticking instead to the chips and salsa.
By late May students typically have some clarity about their paths, but some are paralyzed by the fear of making the wrong decision or choosing a job they end up hating. It is okay to be noncommittal to a specific career because the young and brash ages are typically when there is room for adventure and sampling.
No 18-year-old should only think there is one path. If you want to be a nurse, great. Go to college, take some classes and if you change your mind, try something else. At least you know. You moved toward a goal and discovered it wasn’t for you now you can pivot. That’s not a failure. That’s not a waste. You ordered, tasted, and tried something else. It’s not cowering in the face of a challenge, well it might be, but most of the time in the transition from concept or idea, the act of pursuit reveals a reality that wasn’t included in the dream. Students who want to be veterinarians to help animals sometimes can’t handle being around sick, neglected, abused or dying animals. Some go to flight school, try an electrical apprenticeship or work on a fishing boat then shift. At least they know.
I first discovered the flaws in the popular quote “Do what you love and you’ll never work a day in your life” early in my teaching career. I liked teaching, maybe even loved it, but it was without question, work. Other passionate educators made it clear that a passion was not the absence of work. In order to really love something, effort was necessary. Love can be both a verb and a noun. The noun version is just conceptual or ideological without being tested. The verb is action.
Maybe the problem is Western culture has become so self-centered that we believe everything is supposed to align for us. Mindfulness has become an excuse to be self-absorbed especially for those prone to be me-centric. Those stuck in this mentality don’t take the initiative to change their circumstances and instead broadcast their discontent.
When you surround yourself with creative people moving in a direction, it’s difficult to resist that productive movement, and why would you? Movement is how you get somewhere. Movement is finding something worth working toward rather than complaining about.
Movement means ordering off the menu rather than just attempting to be filled with whatever comes before the main course.
I told the student that the great thing about life is if you order a steak, it comes with options for different steaks and you can take a few bites and go back to the menu or choose one of the new options. You don’t have to be stuck. You’re only stuck if you’re eating the chips and salsa and refuse to make a decision.
“That’s a good metaphor.”
“I know…but as a side note, in real life, don’t expect a great steak from a place that serves chips and salsa as the appetizer.”
“I figured.”
• Jeff Lund is a freelance writer based in Ketchikan. His book, “A Miserable Paradise: Life in Southeast Alaska,” is available in local bookstores and at Amazon.com. “I Went to the Woods” appears twice per month in the Sports and Outdoors section of the Juneau Empire. Due to space limitations this column did not appear last week as scheduled. Next week’s column will appear as usual.
