Election season is upon us. It may feel like we’ve been mired in nonstop campaign chaos all along, but now Election Day is right around the corner. It’s the moment to decide: to vote or not to vote? Let’s look at the pros and cons.
Ten reasons to vote in the upcoming elections:
1. You don’t like the direction that the government is going and you want to throw the bums out. This is the single most popular reason for voting, bar none. If government officials wanted to boost their statistics on voter turnout, all they would have to do is alienate the voting public so much that people turn out en masse to vote them out of office.
2. You like what the government has done for you lately, and you want to support those politicians so they will continue doing good things that benefit both you and society as a whole.
You should be so lucky!
3. You remember your eighth grade civics teacher telling you that voting is a patriotic duty. Since you almost got an A in civics that year, you think it might be worthwhile to vote faithfully for the rest of your life in order to redeem your grade, even at this late date.
4. You want to reserve your right to complain. If you vote and your candidate loses, then you can complain with impunity about the lamentable leader who got elected. But if you don’t vote, you can’t complain. You’ve got no one to blame but yourself.
5. You don’t want to have to listen to your annoying friend saying, “You’ve got no one to blame but yourself,” when that undesirable candidate wins. There’s nothing worse than someone telling you over and over what you already know to be true.
6. You want to be able to rub it in when your friends and relations don’t vote and then complain. There’s nothing more satisfying than saying, “You’ve got no one to blame but yourself,” especially if you, yourself, are blameless.
7. You want the coveted sticker that says, “I Voted.” There’s no better fashion accessory. You may think that your chic new glasses or your expensive wristwatch make you stand out, but on Election Day that little blue sticker captures all the attention. You could wear a designer jacket or a comfortable T-shirt, and it wouldn’t matter either way. All eyes are fixed on that sticker.
8. You don’t want to miss out on the fun. Voting is a happening. There’s no better place to see and be seen than polling places on Election Day. Everyone who’s anyone will be there. If you time it right you might even be standing in line when the famous candidate or another celebrity goes to vote. What a great chance for photo bombing on local or even national television!
9. You don’t want to spoil your Thanksgiving dinner by having to listen to your mom drone on and on about all the lowlifes who didn’t vote. Even if you don’t say anything, you know that she’ll know whether or not you voted. This is a very important consideration, since mashed potatoes and homemade cranberry sauce are at stake.
10. You believe in the principles of democracy, that you have the freedom to vote as well as the responsibility to vote. You might not have many chances to be a superhero in your daily life, but when you go to the polls on Election Day you’re right up there with Spider-Man in his belief that with great power comes great responsibility. Be a superhero, just for one day. But be careful that your web shooters don’t gum up the ballot box.
Of course, there are always two sides to every question.
Ten reasons not to vote in the upcoming elections:
Um … anybody?
Anyone got even one reason not to vote in the upcoming elections? I can’t think of anything.
Bottom line: Go out and vote! Your civics teacher will be proud, your relatives will leave you alone at Thanksgiving dinner, and you’ll probably even get a sticker.
• Peggy McKee Barnhill is a wife, mother and debut author who writes cozy mysteries under the name “Greta McKennan.” Her first novel, Uniformly Dead, is available at Hearthside Books. She likes to look at the bright side of life.