Has someone you deeply care about and trust done something that hurt you so much that you almost died from the emotional pain, which lingered for a very long time?
Have there been times when, months or years later, that same pain and unhappiness return to your heart, no matter how hard you strive to forget, robbing the joy of the new day? Choosing to give more energy to old hurt, even though we know nothing can change it anymore, creates new pain each time we reopen old wounds, deepening and further slowing their healing. When this happens, we ask ourselves — have I truly forgiven the person who hurt me?
Ephesians 4:32: “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”
How can I forgive others when I cannot even forgive myself? Do I trace this back to pride and lack of humility? When I run to our Most Holy Mother Mary in prayer, her response is always the same: “Pray, pray, pray for the grace to forgive. Look at my Son, your Lord Jesus Christ, on the Cross. He forgave, and so must you.”
When I look at Him on the Cross, I remember all His pain — His agony in the Garden of Gethsemane, His scourging at the pillar, the crowning with thorns, the carrying of the very heavy cross and His falling several times, the piercing of His hands and feet at crucifixion, and the sorrows inflicted on Him by our ancestors and, to this day, by all of us who still choose to continue to sin.
How deep is my pain compared to my Lord’s on the Cross? How much deeper are His wounds compared to mine? How much humbler is He, the King of Kings, who humbled Himself to save humanity? Who am I, that He gave His life to forgive and save me, a sinner whose heart is still in deep obscurity at times, still divided between good and evil? I am nothing but dust, and I still cannot forgive others, even when my Lord and Master, the King of the Universe, whose wounds are so much deeper and more painful than mine, has forgiven and continues to forgive and love all mankind.
If we find ourselves still having difficulty with forgiving, ask the Blessed Virgin Mary to be our Mother, to lead us to our Lord Jesus Christ — Who is the Way, the Truth, and the Life — to heal us, to make us whole again, to fill our hearts with love again, and to give us the grace to truly forgive those who have hurt us. Let us invoke the Holy Spirit: “Come, O Holy Spirit, come through the most powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well-beloved Spouse.” We ask this in Jesus’ name. Amen.
• Gina Del Rosario is a Roman Catholic who was born and raised in the Philippines, and is a parishioner at Saint Paul’s Catholic Church in Juneau. “Living & Growing” is a weekly column written by different authors and submitted by local clergy and spiritual leaders. It appears every Saturday on the Juneau Empire’s Faith page.
