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Florists function as decorating consultants
for arrangements that suit the tone of the occasion, whether formal
or casual. Most of your flower decisions are discussed in traditional
wedding planning books. In addition to decorating the ceremony and
reception sites, flowers may adorn special people.
If your extended family is large, a number of mothers and grandmothers,
fathers, grandfathers and step relatives may expect to be distinguished
with corsages and boutonnieres. Of course, you and your fiancé
and your attendants are appropriately adorned. The most popular
way of dealing with the cast of thousands has been to include everyone
in the family with color-coordinated flowers.
Hearts And Flowers
Personal flowers are a small but significant gesture of affection
and respect. Brides and bridegrooms especially enjoy giving them
to stepfamily members as a way of saying, "I'm glad you're
part of my family, particularly on this special day." Bride
Mimi was very clear about her objectives. She said, "I wanted
to set our families apart, literally and figuratively, from the
other guests." It also helps other guests at a big wedding
identify who is part of the inner circle of the family.
If you want to give flowers, it is important to coordinate style
and colors with both the wedding theme and the personal preferences
of the recipients. In addition to mothers, it might also be appropriate
to provide a small corsage to friends and extended family members
who perform special services, such as attending the guest book.
A woman may wear her corsage at her shoulder, on a handbag or on
her wrist. The key men, namely the groom and each of the bride's
and groom's fathers, usually have boutonnieres similar to, but a
bit larger than, the rest of the men in the wedding party.
Petal Dropping
Florists tell me that it helps to know about family relationships
that depart from the "norm." For instance, if you have
two mothers (your mother and stepmother) attending, the corsages
may be quite similar. One florist explains how she handles delicate
family relationships. "I am very careful not to put 'Mom' on
both boxes. I put 'Mom' on one box and the first name of the stepmother
on the other box."
Ask a friend to personally take delivery of the corsages and boutonnieres.
This person will be responsible for distributing them and pinning
them on the recipients. This can eliminate worries for you, especially
if a lot of people are receiving flowers.
When it comes to having flower girls dropping petals in the aisle,
you might want to check with the wedding venue if this is allowed.
Some churches find it a general menace to the state of their carpeting,
and ask the couple to not use the old practice. If that is the case,
you want to pass those instructions on to the rest of the wedding
party as well – or you might end up with a situation like
Julie D.'s:
"Right before my stepdaughter walked down the aisle as the
flower girl (the bridesmaid were already down the aisle), the lady
helping with the flowers told Karen to drop the flowers on the floor.
I jumped in the conversation and told Karen that the church didn't
allow it because it ruined the carpet, so she should not drop them
in the aisle. Well, being the 5-year old that she was, she started
down the aisle and noticed that there was not carpet under the pews
so she threw the petals at the guests. I mean wind-up, step into
it kind of throws. All the way down the aisle - while the guests
flinched as she pelted them with flowers!! It was hysterical and
I would pay lots and lots of money to have that on video."
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